Came across this video on my Facebook newsfeed. I'm sure a lot of us have heard from our mums or even on the TV about how difficult it was to bring us into this world. Personally, I have watched similar videos in the past which were more bloodied. Nonetheless, this video still conjures up a lot of emotions.
Before I came to Sydney three years ago, just the week before I departed, my mum asked me to teach her how to blog. She has stopped writing, but I could still read the posts that she has written previously. There were a few posts dedicated to me. Mainly about me being alone overseas, having to learn to be independent and the parents will not be beside you all the time. I have not been pampered with 'tangible' stuff, as my parents would not get us expensive branded clothing or gameboys or Play Stations. But I have now come to realize that I was being pampered in a different way. Back in the days when I was in High School, I only needed to excel in my studies, and when I encountered problems or if I was stressed, my parents would always be there to support me. And it's their support that made me who I am today. Considered by many as being a 'high achiever'.
I am feeling sad because I am a gay. Yes, I hate being a gay. I hate living two separate lives. Being gay is hard enough already. And because of my impulsive act, I may have ruined my life. It's not just about me in this world. They have 'invested' so much on me, with their patience, hard-work and love.
Still 2 more days of meds. Have been having trouble sleeping these few days and am having slight headache now. Have a presentation due next Wednesday, and a lot to read to prepare for the presentation but I am feeling weak.
Please keep me in your prayers if you could, if you are also a Christian and a gay.
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