Wanted: Friends

I've had a really boring and dull weekend. Despite the skype sessions I had with the cutie from the faraway land, with my parents, sisters and aunt, there was basically nothing exciting at all. 

Oh yea, I met up with a 42 y.o guy yesterday. He's been asking me out so since I had nothing to do, I finally agreed to meet him. The reluctance to meet at first was due to the fact that he's much older than me and I thought it could be hard for us to have common interests and even less possible for us to date. Anyway, he looked quite different from the pic, as he's grown quite a lot horizontally I guess. It was however an okay chat session, dun think we will ever meet again. 

This is my lunch today. A beef, egg, bacon burger, with some garden salad and chips. And needless to say, the flat white is a must-have for me. I eat alone most of the time because I have no friends! 

Yes, I said it, BECAUSE I CAN. LOL. 

It's a very difficult thing, I noticed, for people to admit that they actually don't have that many friends. It's a socially desirable thing to say I have a lot of friends. Not only it will do you good during interviews, it will also most likely create a very desirable image of you to your dates, that you are a popular person. 

I have never had many friends at any one point in time. I like to distinguish classmates or colleagues from friends. I think it's necessary to make such a distinction between them. They are not the same. 

For me, I have basically three groups/species of friends. 

A) Straight friends from uni. They are more than 100% straight, very straight, and I never doubt their straightness kind of straight friends. Currently, there are about a a few guys, and a few girls that we chat with quite frequently. We created a whatsapp group. Some of us had a dinner last week. I am not out to them. 

B) Gay friends. Not people I chatted with on Jack'D, they are not friends yet, as I haven't even met 99 percent of them. My best gay friend, Hx left Australia for good. I also lost contact with the few gay friends he introduced to me since he's always the one organizing meet ups. 

'The couple' friends. They are a lot older than me. Love to visit them especially when I needed advice or someone genuine to talk with. They are more like my family and not so much like friends who go out together. Probably because of the age gap. Also, I don't want to 'disturb' their routines too much as they kinda have a 'stable' life, things they do. And I am not really part of them so I can't visit them that often. 

'Short-term', come-and-go friends. I do understand that people come and go but what I am referring to here are those that really come and go within a few weeks. There are quite a few of them. We chatted well on Jack'D, we met up, chatted quite well, but somehow we gradually stopped talking to each other and it died off. 

C) Suspected-to-be-gay friends. There are currently two of them. Classmates or college mates of mine. I can feel that they are different. Never had a girl friend. They both can talk to me for hours like sisters (straight guys just cannot do that la). Couldn't find them on Jack'D though. Have been trying to steer our conversations to topics like finding a gf, sex jokes, but it's so hard to get them out of the closet. Let me know if you have experience helping people like them. I couldn't just tell them I'm gay coz i need to protect myself too. 

So yea, there isn't many, not even five that I can hang out comfortably with in Sydney. With these still-in-the-closet or gay couple or straight friends, I can't really do what a gay is supposed to do with his friends. There's no one to go clubbing with (not that I am a clubber), no one to talk to about gay sex, gay gossips, no one to go shopping with, dun even mention things like playing some sports like badminton, tennis, gym or yoga. 

I am so Frusssttt with Jack'D recently. Really feel like deleting it. I started to lose hope with this gay community. I don't know what's the percentage of gays who are on the app. Everything is centered on Sexxx. 

Ok la, I can say that I am not that bad looking. I am actually very handsome (just kidding la). But probably because I have been declining 'funs', or maybe because of the things I said on my profile (not looking for ONS, etc.) people who have been using the app for a while actually won't even view my profile anymore. Those were the ones who have messaged me previously, chatted for a while, and when they got to know that I really mean it when I say I m not looking for fun, they will say 'got to go to bed now, ttyl or chat to you later' and they will never msg you again, but they won't block me. 

There were lotsss of them, (see I told you I am not that bad), who have either chatted/ met with me. But when they noticed that we weren't going to have sex, they stopped talking to you. 

I saw Strictly Gay's post on looking for travel buddies, and have been reading Williamnyk's posts on his dining outs with family and besties. So I thought I shall try writing this, and hopefully by 0.00000001 % chance that Someone nice sees this, I will have someone to spend some time with in this rather boring city. 

It's irrefutably true that most single gays are hoping that the someone nice they meet will one day become their boyfriends, me included. But that's not the purpose of this post, I just want someone nice to hang out with, like my Hx who's left Sydney. We can be sisters or brothers, I am kinda VERSATILE.