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Blood donation

It's been 6 weeks post-PEP.

Yesterday, I went for a blood donation. Yes, a blood donation. It's my first time.

To be honest, the main reason I went for a blood donation was not because I wanted to help people. It sounds so wrong, I know.

Don't get me wrong. I've always wanted to donate blood. The Australian Red Cross will have mobile station set up in my university a few times a year. But I didn't want to donate previously because I was treated with Isotretinoin, for my acne problem, and that I was told not to give blood for at least a year because if pregnant ladies receive my blood, the babies will be deformed.

But this time, the main reason that caused me to donate blood was that I wanted to have my blood tested. Recently, I found out that the Australian Red Cross screens all donated blood using very sensitive NAT/PCR tests. I wanted myself to be tested by the most sensitive tests, tests that I wouldn't be able to undergo at my GP. I knew I wouldn't put people at risk because they screen the blood very carefully before approving them to be put on the inventory.

The donation itself only took about 10-15 minutes, but I had to fill up some questionnaires and had to have my hemoglobin level tested first. After the donation, I was given some free refreshments. Had a chocolate milkshake and a banana muffin. I wanted a hot coffee but was advised to take cold drinks because hot drinks will dilate the blood vessels.

I was surprised with the needle they used. It was huge. Not exaggerating. It's about three times the diameter of the regular ones used to draFw blood during health checks. It's not that painful though. 470ml of blood was taken, and before that another 30ml was taken for various tests to be performed.

I can only pray that they will not contact me and say something is wrong. I hope I will be fine, and that my blood will be used to help people. And that I could remain healthy, and to be a regular donor.

Feeling slightly tired today, with tense neck and shoulders. I'm still feeling worried about my health. I thought I could put that incident behind very soon, once I am cleared with the tests. But why did I commit the same mistake again? Just a few days ago, I had unprotected oral sex. Experts will say the risk is very low but it's not absolutely risk-free. I am so stupid! so slutty!

I want to get out of this vicious cycle. I don't want to be trapped. I don't want to feel guilty and worried every time I have sex. I want to have a meaningful life. A happy life. I want to meet someone that I can love with all my heart.

But I'm struggling. There are temptations. I can be weak sometimes. God please strengthen me, protect me, deliver me away from temptations and evils. And God, please trust me that I sincerely want to change, and that I need help, I need guidance along the way.


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Comments

  1. soul232July 15, 2013 at 1:45 AM

    I thought we arent allow to donate blood in australia if we have sex with guy? If possible, dont do it again because u might get charged if they found out.

    hang on, bryan. *hugs* God bless u

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. untold stories July 16, 2013 at 12:30 PM

      They didn't actually ask specifically about that. But yea I know about it now. Thanks.

      Btw, are you in Australia?

      Delete
    2. soul232July 16, 2013 at 12:33 PM

      oh they didnt? maybe they change the questionaire already since the last time.

      I was there for study last time =)

      Delete

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